The Killer May track is also an exclusive version to this flexi which is a completely different recording than the ones that appeared on their first demo tape and the "Joy Stick" first full-length album. Their music is more like melodic metal and hard rock.
The first album is great and the songs are catchy as hell. I'd totally recommend Killer May's early materials for those into the melodic and catchy stuff from Japan. Mazeran "Danger" From "Moving Lips" 12". Here's another extremely rare, obscure '80s Japanese metal gem.
This one's super tough to find! Similar to the heavy metal style Murbas played. Since Medusa's formation inthe vocalist was replaced three times throught the band's history. And, I must say that these guys has a bit crazy and complicated history as far as the lineup change goes. Also, their band sound had evolved from a generic hard rock style they played in the early days to more heavy metal sound after having the lineups changed so drastically, which was a good thing because their earlier style wasn't all that great at all.
Well, check this out. So, the band was formed in when all the members were about 16 years old. The "Heavy Metal Force" track was recorded with their original vocalist who left the band shortly after this recording and was replaced to the new one. The 2nd vocalist as well as the guitarist left inthen the band went on hiatus until when they finally got the 3rd vocalist, the new guitarist and the new bassist as well.
At this point, the only original member left was the drummer! Inwith this brand-new lineup they recorded two songs for the classic "Metal Warning" double LP compilation as well as for this "Running Away" promo flexi which was given away free at the two live shows in Osaka and Tokyo during the long tour where they played nearly 30 shows. The flexi was "promo-only" and has never been officially available for sale.
Many bands in Japan used to make these free flexis and tapes to give away and promote their bands and normally only a small number of them were made, like copies, sometimes less or more The vocalist was replaced again sometime inplayed a few shows after the 4th vocalist joined but then the band went on hiatus again!
Damn, all these guys played in this band must have hated each other so badly Inthey got back together featuring the same vocalist they had at the time of their break-up inbut for whatever the reason they decided to get another vocalist!
Yes, wtf, right??? The show lineup included Medusa, Christ, Rattlesnake feat. Medusa on The Metal Archives. Medusa Official Website. This is an out-of-print re-mastered CD edition of their '87 first full-length album. Some great memory of this band from back when I was like 12 or Either Presence or Ladies Room was the first metal band I've ever seen live back in the day.
Presence on The Metal Archives. Presence on japan-metal-indies. This nicely quality, limited 12" contains the "Deathly Fighter" 7" EP '84, Dogma Records and the unreleased '84 live material include 6 songs, one of which is a cover version of "Bark At The Moon".
The limited edition, double CD set containing the re-mastered reissue of their long out of print 1st CD album called "Final Collection" Disc-1originally released in ' Gish left Rapes in Right after they released the "Final Collection" CD in '91, the band went temporarily inactive until they've got Gish and Koichi as the new permanent members in ' The new lineup with ex-Rosenfeld members dramatically improved the quality of Rapes' music style and their unique, HC-influenced violent metal sound became thrashier and stronger than ever before!!!
This copy of the "Fly Again" 2CD set I 'm selling is the original first pressing that came out in '98, not the '08 digitally remastered re-issue that came in a cardboard paper sleeve. Note: The '98 first edition never originally released with obi.
Note: The back side and around a corner of the jewel case is damaged. Rapes Official Website. Reaction's third full-length album. Reaction on The Metal Archives. Rose on The Metal Archives. According to the liner-notes in the "Pigs Of The Empire" CD booklet, copies of these were made in April after the second guitarist Hiromi joined the band.
This was their first recording since they got back together in January So I assume what Kawamoto said is true, however, I can't be sure whether all copies were sold this way or some actually came with one. The sound quality of this tape is obviously way better than most of the shitty MP3 or boot copies floating around online. A rare piece of Japanese thrash metal history. Rosenfeld on The Metal Archives.
Rosy Roxy Roller Official Website. Roxcy reviews, Download links, etc. Sex Messiah on The Metal Archives. Takashi O'Hashi : talkin' about Slumlords. Takashi O'Hashi on radio interview about Slumlords, etc. This one is highly sought after among collectors and fans of Terra Rosa. Super-rare promo 7" vinyl issue of the CD single this amazing heavy metal band put out in ' Released on Crime label a.
The title track "Hi no naka ni kage" translates to "The Shadow In The Fire" is an excellent song about nuclear, which also appeared on the band's last album "Sase" that came out shortly after. Supposed to be a different version but I'm not very sure. The B-side track " Craggy Rhymester" is a non-album track and is exclusive to this single. The front sleeve indicates "Not For Sale" as well as on the center labels in Japanese.
Terra Rosa on The Metal Archives. Flickers, Ziggy and the list goes on This particluar style of hard rock was huge in Japan back in the late '80s to early '90s. If you listen to and compare the earlier and the later hard rock-era materials by the bands like Magenda, Eliza, Tilt or Mazeran, you get the idea.
Still unopened in original bag, sealed with a little sticker. So I don't know what the serial number is on this copy. Another super-nice collector's item from H. United on The Metal Archives. Listen to United! Vasara Vasalla on The Metal Archives. Some of these bands later became pretty well known, while some are more on the obscure side of the Japanese underground metal scene.
Also their drummer played in Gibbed and Unholy Grave. Satanic Hellslaughter is probably known for their tracks on the classic "Thrashing Deathpower" 3-way split CD. The Equinox was from Nagoya, I think. Totally unknown band that used to play gigs with the bands like Deathpeed pre-Unholy GraveGibbed and S. I don't think they've released anything. This comp is an important document of the early Japanese death metal and grindcore scene. A must hear compilation if you're into all that brutal-as-fuck bands like Gibbed, Unholy Grave, S.
You won't be disappointed. This is a tough to find CD that hardly ever pops up for sale. The large 2-sided insert and obi are in excellent condition and everything else is in mint condition like new. Very nice copy of such a rare and killer comp CD.
Hellchild on The Metal Archives. Transgressor on The Metal Archives. Terror Fector on The Metal Archives. You can find more examples of Friday catblogging by searching a blog search engine such as Technorati for "catblogging. Then, when the weekend is nearly over, head over to The Carnival of the Cats for more kitty goodness. New Holocaust History Museum?
Is this some sort of New Holocaust going or, or is it some kind of New History going on? Anyway, here's hoping the money goes towards some desperately-needed improvements there. I mean, not only does the rollercoaster ride there use cheap-ass old wooden boxcars instead of cool high-tech cars that go upside down and stuff, but it's always broken.
Another case of bad intelligence in Iraq:. I'd like to take a moment to condemn the American Mass Media for wasting so much time and effort on covering all this garbage surrounding celebrities in African countries adopting babies, and then every legal twist and turn that comes up when some party or another opens their yap to a camera. FrankJ and SarahK are not adopting a baby from Malawi, Botswana, Limbobo, or whatever the heck the countries are named there this week.
They are merely visiting the sweatshops in which the "Nuke The Moon" T-shirts are being produced, trying to come up with ways of increasing production and reducing inefficiencies while maximizing profits.
Any small dark children FrankJ and SarahK might have been photographed with in the airport are not the targets of adoption, but research samples for possible experiments in labor-saving automation systems. Hopefully this will stop the rumors in their tracks and we can get back to more important matters. If you must have some semblance of politics or humor in everything you read here, just assume that Piper is One last note Meryl Yourish's Gracie is going in for surgery this morning.
Well, it seems that some of y'all are wanting a IMAO Video Podcast, so FrankJ rolled a dime down the stairs, I ran after it, and he locked me in the basement until I came up with a video podcast. I resisted the penny and the nickel, but when it was a dime, well, I just couldn't resist! Damn my money-sniffing genes! I know that many of you were hoping for SarahK to star in the IMAO Video Podcast because she's so pretty and all way prettier than Michelle Malkinbut FrankJ wasn't about to leave her locked in the basement with me, so Not that he's asking me, but FrankJ could use these quotes for the back of the jacket cover of his book if he ever gets around to finishing it Some things have changed since the first edition.
But you probably don't remember them. And we made you quack like a duck, too. I was going to read it, but my crazy wife pulled out a gun and shot me in the chest. If only he'd have given me a hardback instead of a paperback proof, I'd be alive today. However, I'm sure that he's got quotes from a whole bunch of big and famous people.
I tried that, and I still wound up leaving the back cover to my own book blank. If you could contribute a thoughtful, insightful, and meaningful quote to the back jacket cover of Frank's book without actually having read the thing, what would it be?
All of the other IMAO bloggers are looking for black cats to catblog with, seeing as how this is Friday the Thirteenth and Halloween is approaching. But I'm willing to settle with a pumpkin-puss orange goofball of a cat so I can make the Friday Catblogging deadline.
If you must have some semblance of politics or humor in everything you read here, just assume that Nardo is For their efforts to prevent nuclear energy from being used for military purposes and to ensure that nuclear energy for peaceful purposes is used in the safest possible way. Last night, my wife and I went on a shopping adventure in the Galleria-Post Oak area of the city, looking for Jean Michel-Jarre and Michael Oldfield CDs to replace the ones I've allowed to get scratched well before I got my lifetime's listening enjoyment out of them or get them ripped into MP3 format.
Best Buy had "Tubular Bells" and no Jarre. Barnes and Nobles had "Magnetic Fields" and the compilations, but no Oldfield. So I do my usual and pop into Amazon this morning, and sure enough, everything is there.
From one end of the discography to well after each jumped the shark. Okay, so the shopping trip also included some other things, such as a trip to The Container Store for a plastic container that the cedar planks I use for grilling still won't fit into, and then Williams-Sonoma for cedar planks that won't fit in the container, and so on.
There were a few other stops, but by then my caffeine had run out and I was in that weird fog of zombietude before getting a recharge. But the idea of going hunting for music at the major chain stores and thinking you'll find much of a selection beyond the here-and-now is pretty much a thing of the past with Amazon and iTunes and such.
I remember back when it was that the album hadn't been remastered and sent off to production yet. When you'd think of a CD as "not available yet" instead of "no longer in print" or "go hit a specialty shop" or "it's either used or download time. The reason for all of this is that I'm a horribly difficult person to shop for when it comes to presents, having been the cause of many an argument and disruption in the bliss that is my marriage. Nobody drops by and visits at random, and Karaoke is most fun at a Karaoke bar, so what good was a Karaoke machine when I just sing along badly to WinAmp?
So, it's just easier to hand me gift certificates or drag me along in a half-conscious fog and then count of the fact that I won't remember most of what was purchased when I come around. Which is what happened last night. I'm bedazzled by the fancy lights and things, stumbling around and occasionally needing to prop up on a freestanding display while giving simple answers like Captain Pike in the Star Trek Pilot Can't buy things for the cats, despite the fact that things for the cats end up being things for me.
It's got to be for me and me alone, it seems. I do such a horrible job of keeping the Amazon wishlist up to date, forgetting to stick a few token useless things like Lego Mindstorms NXT to build a wireless cat-tracking catcam tank or those albums I mentioned earlier. And asking for useful things like socks and underwear and new shoes is far too practical for consideration as a gift How many sweaters did I get for Hannukhah over the years?
Okay, so the umbrella I've got is handy and useful and practical, but I thought I'd lost it, bought another, and now I have two of the same umbrella with me at all times Ever gone Darth Maul on a thundershower? Or I end up buying the thing for myself that's the obvious gift, since I'm so impatient and flighty. The garlic roaster, the IR webcam, the USB fishtank, the USB missiles, the Panasonic webcam, and some other recent purchases were all on my various informal wishlists that, thanks to online commerce, didn't remain on those lists for very long.
I was supposed to come up with a shopping list of parts for a new podcasting setup, but didn't get those in time so they could be ordered. By the time Christmas rolls around, I'll likely have spend blogging revenue checks on that for myself Also, I bought a stuffed manta ray toy for Nardo off of the wishlist. That shows impatience and buying things for the cats instead of myself - doubly-bad me! And that's Album) insight into the world of the not-so-typical, rambling pain in the ass 37 year-old American male.
Sure, Saddam got tossed out of the courtroom once again, making the arrest of the genocidal madman asp aopposed to shooting him and filling in his spider-hole seem like a huge mistake in retrospect. But of all the outbursts, a dollop of wisdom from one of his co-defendants:.
Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Terrell Owens is writing a series of childrens books Really likes the IMAO podcast. There's an old joke that Moses was a fool because Album) settled the early Israelites in the only land in the Middle East that didn't have any oil.
It turns out that there may be oil under Israel after all:. Finally, a source of oil that doesn't fund terrorism or the bloated Alaskan social services bureaucracy. Q: So, what will happen now that the chat ABC posted on its web site turns out to have been between ex-Congressman Mark Foley and a then year oldthus making that disturbing chat between two consenting male adults?
Yes, I know, I left myself off the cast list there. Gary gives only so much space for that field, and I figured I should mention everybody else first. Because I'm a nice guy So, Frank and Sarah, Album), did you have one of these at your wedding? From Representative Mark Foley's website :. I guess we now know what made him such an expert in the field to get a co-chairmanship of the Missing and Exploited Children Caucus.
Speaking of which, I wonder how old the newly -former Congressman is. And what he wants for his birthday. None of that is in his bio on the site. Next year we're sticking to jumper cables and flowers.
According to my copy The Torah, we are told that Yom Kippur is observed by posting photos of cats. However, seeing as how Right Wing Duck and Harvey are off giggling in the corner and there's the stench of Liquid Paper coming from my Torah, I think there's some malfeasance afoot. In case there are a few deranged folks out there that are here just for the Friday Catblogging I've been doing some fundraising for a replacement wireless webcam for my catcams site recently.
The last one Frisky got loose, we had to leave for a wedding, and if it had run properly we'd have known he didn't run off for good, but was coming back to the patio every few hours to get food and water placed in view of the flaky camera.
So I am overwhelmed with joy and gratitude at everyone's contributions towards the new catcam after I torched the old Sony for screwing me over during the time I needed it most.
Thanks to everyone who's Amazoned or Paypalled a few bucks to chip in. If there's money to spare, I'll put it towards a second catcam or some new scratching posts to put on camera that Nardo will most certainly topple over at some point during each day. Vegas might even take bets on when they get hauled down. Thanks to everyone, and thank God for giving me the moment where I saw my wife walking around the corner Sunday evening with Frisky in her arms.
I keep telling them that Rosh Hoshana is Rush Limbaugh's stepbrother. So we're all familiar with Venezuelan thug Hugo Chavez's use of gifts of cheap gas and heating oil to poor Americans through Citgo, but did you realize that he's also using Citgo for even more nefarious attempts to win the hearts and minds of unsuspecting dupes?
That's right. Take a big whiff of these wobbly-necked Satanic icons, people. I bet you'll smell the infernal reek of sulfur. I refuse to accept such cheap trinkets from a petrofascist scumbag. Especially when it looks like Roger's been given the Mary Kate Olsen treatment Well, it's that time of year again The United Nations General Assembly meets for the 61th time.
This means there will be the usual parade of dictators, despots, and death-dealers lining up to shriek, bitch, and beg. Now I proposed a few fun games to play two years ago, and I even got a drinking game together for 60but times change A speaker demands Kofi Annan gets re-elected to a third term as Secretary General.
A shoe or other form of footwear is pounded on the podium. Hezbollah, Al-Qaida and Viacom send representatives to speak at the podium.
Someone says "Sofia Loren's in her seventies, and she's still hot! The Twelfth Imam emerges from under the podium, wipes his mouth, and says "One hundred and eightythree! Beat that, Elton John! Oh, and feel free to study last year's archive of speeches to study what this collective bunch of bastards love to whine about.
Not only does the webcast let you see the unedited ie uncensored by AP and Reuters whining from around the world, but you can watch the proceedings at your liesure to avoid having to drink while at work. We believe that we have done our best to stick to official records when dramatizing Friday Catblogging incidents in the White House that led to Osama Bin Laden's unfortunate survival of the Twentieth Century.
Life may be Skittles and life may be beer, but not in Texarkana when you're a pigeon I'd rather be screwed by absurdly high interest rates. Oh boy. Get the company's name mentioned twice.
That should offset the expense of stadium naming rights and sponsoring state fair baking contests. Yeah, most people putting out poison for animals don't mean any harm to them. They're hoping that the animals enjoy extreme physical discomfort and death, vomiting and wobbling into oblivious with delight. When was the last time you've heard "Death" listed as a "side effect" in a pharmaceutical commercial?
Here's what I got out of it: "Don't eat corn you find on the roof. Here's a list of animals that won't be killed in the process: stingrays, moose, dragons, emus, coelocanth, and Pete Doherty. Let's face it. At this point, Doherty could speedball a Wallgreens and still walk in a straight line. The method of poisoning was corn, not peanuts. If you subscribe to Yahoo News or any other Breaking News message alert system, you're probably getting a series of messages marking the moments of silence for the planes hitting the Towers and the Pentagon, the crack of flight 93, and the collapse of each tower.
I'm sure that some sick and deranged Daily Kos or IndyMedia or Al-Jazeerah types are sending out parallel messages marking when the Jews got their text pages warning them not to go into work, when the Bush Administration secretly planted the charges in each of the towers, when the Air Force jets shot down the flights, Michael Moore going to Dennys for three Grand Slam meats, Cheney returning to his docking station for a recharge, and when Bush was finished reading "My Pet Goat" to the kids in the classroom.
What sticks out in my memory? Flash to today, and the old bastard is just so much filler in a parking lot. Yet "Unity" government or not, terror is terror, so bomb them all and let Satan sort the dancing, candy-passing bastards out.
Congratulations, you just killed an intruder with your Album) hands! Without these Friday Catblogging posts, commenter Bilbo would have to post his "You like cats. This means you're gay" comments in Frank's posts, and Frank wouldn't be satisfied with just deleting the comments or altering them to some random silly phrase. No, he'd ask SarahK to hunt down and kill the little creep. Actually hunting down and killing a nuisance is not what a keyboard-riding chickenhawk does. It would set a bad example to all the other bloggers out there, and we're all about peace, love, and understanding here, right?
Just to confirm the fact that any sentiments expressed by Katie Couric at the end of each evening newscast are entirely disingenuine, she's asking the viewing audience to come up with what will be her trademark parting phrase. Not because I demanded it in the contract, but everyone else put it in theirs. Q: Why would passengers be spooked by a old Jew praying on an airplane? A: They're worried that if they ignore him, he'll throw his walking stick down and The Lord will turn it into a snake.
Exodus I posted "Mining Accident" a few months ago when it was decided it would be in bad taste to mock the West Virginia mining accidents in such a fashion. Well, this one never quite made it because cruise ships didn't exactly factor in this summer's headlines like they have in the past.
Plus, everybody is still lazy and tired from a long hot summer. And gras prices are way too high. I'm sure that my "Bargain Hunter" parody of Steve Irwin will end up in the discard bin now. It was a good one too, with me risking my life by going to huge holiday sales and taunting wild and dangerous shoppers. Oy Gevalt! And such nice material! SARAH: "And then stealing bits and pieces from the cruise ships so we could assemble our own and make lots of money!
LAIR: "Hold on Nuclear power is cheaper than diesel. Karl Rove didn't give us those blueprints just to go all Godless on this thing. From now on, it's left, right, front, and back. Liberal 1: Well, you shouldn't leave your towel on the floor and bow down so people can trip over you. Liberal 2: Oh, great! We need an exterminator. You wouldn't believe the size of the cockroaches in the cabins. Go to the bottom of the ship and tear the duct tape? Narrator: "And with a single rip Karl Rove's nefarious plan is put into action Liberal 1: "I'm sorry, Senator Kennedy, but without any lifeboats, we're having to ride on you as a floatation device.
Will Aquaman ever get any respect. Lair rescued by Zionist sub From Turkey, the same country that keeps Adolf Hitler's Mein Kampf in their Bestseller's list, civilization is further lessened by t heir recent bastardization of Pinocchio and other classic Western folk tales:.
In a new version of the book, that was released in Turkey, Pinocchio turns to his father and emotionally announces: "In the name of Allah, give me some bread. Gepetto's workshop is used for making wooden rifles for Palestinian security forces while they sell the real rifles to Hamas and Islamic Jihad.
The Blue Fairy wears a Blue Helmet and is pretty much useless throughout the whole story, spending her time sipping tea with Hezbollah snipers to provide them international peacekeeper human shield coverage. The Marionette Theater is really just a front for a Saudi-funded madrassa that preaches Wahhab extremism. The Cat and The Fox are Mossad agents, trying to make Pinocchio reveal the location of terrorist cells and weapons factories. Who's ever heard of whales in the Mediterranean?
It's more likely he's swallowed up into an Israeli detention center and reunited with Gepetto the terrorist there. Of course, once he's a real boy, Gepetto can still circumcise him with a pair of rusty pruning shears. I get stuck doing this because everybody else is off at the mosque, bowing over and over again on the dirty floor because Frank J. Will he buy new ones? Of course not, the cheap bastard! Usually the Palestinians use cell phones or suicide bombers to set off explosives to kill Jews, not timers.
I'd like to take a moment to apologize to all the Muslim readers of IMAO out there for falsely characterizing Islam as a backward and barbaric religion that forces non-Muslims to convert to Islam or face the sword. After all, this isand nobody uses swords anymore. The implement of death used to threaten nonbelievers is the gun :.
Only by getting rid of such wild myths and false accusations can we, the Western World, come to a better understanding of our Muslim neighbors. This is how I compensate for not having teh funny. Well, that and beating up Spacemonkey, but everybody does that these days.
A lot of you have been wondering why I haven't said anything about Israel buying two more Dolphin-class submarines from the Germans. Well, aside from the fact that the Zionist Conspiracy would have me rubbed out as a traitor, there is now the problem of Paul McCartney wanting to rub me out, too In the town where I mitzvahed, Muslims pushed us all into the sea, Oy Gevalt! We will return To the Holy Land, with submarines. So we sailed to Miami Beach, In the offseason, what, are we rich?
And we loaded up with borscht In our Jewish submarine. We all live in a Jewish submarine, Jewish submarine, Jewish submarine, We all live in a Jewish submarine, Jewish submarine, Jewish submarine. And our family's all aboard, Even Sylvia that vicious whoreAnd the band begins to play. Bagels, lox, and good cream cheese, Everyone of us has all we need has all we need Flag of blue, flag of blue and lots of green lots of green In our Jewish in our Jewish submarine submarine. Having babies out of wedlock Did you know there were such things as bomb recycling plants?
Puneet Sablok said he would remove Hitler's name and the Nazi swastika from billboards and the eatery's menu since it had angered so many people. He had previously said the name and symbols were only meant to attract attention. I never wanted to hurt people's feelings," said Sablok, who made the decision after meeting with members from Bombay's small Jewish community.
He did not say what the new name would be. I say Mel Gibson, but call it "Mel's Diner. Maybe even get Linda Lavin to show up at the opening. Lots of worry over this 12th imam thing going around Ahmadinejad is due Tuesday to deliver Iran's response to an international incentive program offered in exchange for the country curbing its nuclear program.
The date, August 22, also marks the prophet Muhammad's ascension to heaven and coincides with Saladin's conquest of Jerusalem. Not to be left out of the loop, Frisky's keeping an eye out for the 12th imam on our patio A: Some people swear by the French Surrender Toast, but there's no better breakfast than their Blintzkrieg I guess the question I should ask is how stoned do you have to be to be concerned if a fish is joyful?
I think I ought to drive. Joy to the fishes. I don't care. We're still going to Red Lobster. Now shut up! We're just a few minutes from the hospital.
Although, to tell you the truth, it would be a vast improvement on old Wahab thugs like King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia. Have you told me what you want? What you really, really want? Well, we're all out of that zigga-zig-zoom. Spacemonkey ate it all. So I'm stuck with this peddling this crap. If you must have some semblance of politics or humor in everything you read here, just assume that Edloe is The International Astronomical Union is currently working on a final definition of what a planet is so that the debate over whether Pluto is a planet or not will finally end and astronomers can finally tilt their telescopes back at the open bathroom window of their hot next door neighbor.
Thanks to some skillful detective work involving one of our contributors disguising himself as a janitor, IMAO has received a patrial list of the IAU's list of planets and non-planets Apparently, there's still some doubt about Uranus, possibly due to the less mature members of the IAU sniggering and giggling whenever its name is mentioned.
A: Just a thousand? Better buy six thousand. There's a lot of Jews needing advance warning not to go into work the day Israel bombs the Empire State Building, you know. However, the new moon is making it difficult, not impossible, to view the spectacular annual nighttime show.
I asked FrankJ whether he could accelerate his plans to Nuke The Moon to resolve this astronomical problem.
This is when I make some kind of silly statement about how I'm the only one who catblogs here, but the Department Of Homeland Security has imposed severe restrictions on excuse-making at airports due to the recent raising of the Threat Level from Yellow to Red.
Q: What will prohibiting hair gel, liquid soap, shampoo, and other gel-based toiletries do to stop airline terrorism? A: By banning basic grooming products only the French will fly, and they'll surrender quickly to Air Marshals.
So the tapes from the Mel Gibson incident won't be released? TMZ argued the tapes should be seen and heard by the public to assess whether Gibson received preferential treatment from the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department. Gross, principal deputy for the county counsel's office. That means they must remain sealed, Gross said. That's rather sad, because I have it on good word that the tapes actually exonerate Mel Gibson. Well, you see, the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department isn't all that swift when it comes to writing reports and taking down statements.
Add in the fact that Mel Gibson has a pretty thick Aussie accent and he was legally drunk. Ever try to understand an Australian who wasn't drunk? Might as well be from Mars for all it' worth. Anyway, he's thought to have said: "Fking Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world. And it broke his heart to see what Stephen Spielberg did with it in his remake. Just in case you didn't know, Stephen Spielberg is Jewish. And so is Paula Kauffman Wagner, who was the executive producer on the project.
Two Jews. Responsible for War Of The Worlds. Dear Cynthia. Dennis Miller returns to television, courtesy of Fox News:. Apparently, Kiss fans take their fandom way too seriously:.
Fans, some from as far away as California, carried signs Saturday and had painted their faces in black-and-white to resemble Kiss band members. Those participating in the half-hour demonstration were upset that the band, formed more than 30 years ago, has not been admitted, even though it has been eligible since the late s. If the selection committee caves in to this strong-arm tactic from militant groups like the Kiss Army, it's only a matter of time before The Al Jarreau Martyrs Brigade and the Yusuf Islam Jihad threaten their own terrorist actions against the museum.
Besides, what has Kiss really given to the world of Rock And Roll besides ludicrous makeup? Before he was assigned to cover the Hezbollah-Israeli Conflict in Beirut by Reuters, it turns out that Adnan Hajj had been given another assignment long, long ago in a galaxy far, far away. Even though his word was masterful and captivating, Tatooine was outside of The Republic, so he didn't qualify for Pulitzer Prize nomination.
Still, he received much praise for his undercover work in the Mos Eisley Cantina exploring Greedo's Jewish roots. According to his personnel file at the Mos Eisley Bureau, Hajj was sent back to the office by Hutt frozen in carbonite, thawed out, and returned to Reuters Headquarters for reassignment. Not only am I responsible for all of the wars in the world so says Mel Gibsonbut I am responsible for all of the catblogging here. If you must have some semblance of politics or humor in everything you read here, just assume that Frisky is For the past three weeks, I thought I was playing that America's Army combat training and simulation game, but it turned out I was playing America's Salvation Army.
Now the whole "Hit the mouse button to ring the bell, repeat. Yeah, the whole "Beirut" thing is cover for flying to the moon and nuking it. Anyway, no use crying over spilt Kosher wine.
Do we need to get Kevin to change the logo of the site to a nuclear explosion on Mars? By cutting back on maintenance of course. As in degrees. The plane's auxiliary power unit, which generates electricity when engines are shut down at the gate, was broken.
That killed the air conditioning and triggered a five-hour ordeal for passengers and crew. All other flights to Denver were booked. United tried to find a replacement plane, but none was available. United officials had a dilemma: Figure out how to cool the plane in near degree heat, then board the passengers and send them to Denver; or buy them hotel rooms in Chicago. Now, this incident alone might make you think United Airlines was just a bunch of cold-hearted bastards looking to make q uick buck off of the suckers unlucky enough to have Priceline put their asses in United seats, but the truth is that every airline is running a passenger torture promotion of one sort of another:.
Delta Airlines runs a lottery on flights 2 hours or longer where the winner is stuffed into a bathroom with live rats. Olympic Airlines makes you sit next to a smelly Greek.
Oh, wait American Airlines has ordered all pilots to scream nonstop during bad weather conditions. When they're drunk, they take turns playing the Arab with the boxcutter. JetBlue has cut back unionized staff, using prisoners as cabin attendants. But don't worry Continental still provides pillows and blankets.
Of course, what's to stop them from smothering you with them in your sleep? TWA hasn't actually resumed operations, but they will occasionally roll a plane up to a gate, take on passengers, and then run up and down the aisle with a baseball bat taking swings at anyone asking to deplane.
El Al's Complaints Department responds with "Without us, you'd be riding in boxcars to your deaths! Be grateful all we did was lose your luggage! If Mel Gibson had been arrested by a female cop with breast implants, would he have called her "sugar-substitute tits"?
How will Jews know that Mel Gibson's apology to Jews around the world for anti-Semitic slurs blaming all the wars in the world on Jews is heartfelt and genuine?
Well, thanks CNN. Thank you for telling the world that Mel Gibson was out driving drunk, got in an altercation with the arresting officers, and didn't make any berserk anti-Semitic comments at all. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm a very busy man. I'm responsible for all the wars in the world, you know.
Well, I started young, an apprentice manager of the Pepsi-Coke Cola Wars of the 80's and worked my way up the ranks. Then, I consulted with the Iran-Iraq Wars. You know, because sending Shia Persians against Sunni Arabs was a great way to thin the enemy herd. From there, nothing but success. A stint managing the Bandeh Aceh War more Islamic sectarian violence to thwat Indonesian imperial designsa few months working with the El Salvador Conflict, a few weeks compounding the Yemeni and Chechen Civil Wars, and then off to South Ossetia for my greatest achievement.
I'm still pissed at the Jews who coordinated all of that I wish they'd have told me before screwing up my own pricefixing gig. I joined IMAO specifically for the opportunity to be the Jew who coordinates the first war on the moon. After all, Frank's going to nuke the moon one day, so I might as well ride his coat-tails and make sure that someone gets nuked up there that deserves it. Normally, I'm a loyal contributor to this site, but Frank J.
Pacman has a chronic eating disorder. He's addicted to food, and it's all the fault of the Pellet Manufacturing Industry Lobby and the software developers for making that food both plentiful and easily-available to him.
Not only is that food abundant, but it's horribly unhealthy. The nutritional value of those pellets are next to nothing I mean, why else would he need to eat so much of it?
And what do you think he does in between that pause where he clears a screen and the next one is being set up? All the ghosts are just trying to do is to get Pacman to face his food addiction and get him to stop eating so much.
The ghosts aren't trying to chase and kill Pacman And that's why the Power Pellets are there in the corners The ones that are trying desperately to save him.
Oh, God, how I wish the misery would end! How I long for the day where Pacman could stick to a healthy diet of fruits, vegetables, nuts, and whole grains.
Instead, those are just tossed into the maze as "Bonuses" now and then as a token attempt to appease nutritionists and the tireless crusaders of the FDA. I'm all too familiar with the horror of video game characters trying to maintain unrealistic body images.
With today's graphics advances, anti-aliasing techniques, and rendering technologies the characters feel compelled to do unspeakable things to themselves to remain popular. Just the other day, I was chatting with Lara C.
She has an amazing workout routine, but she just doesn't feed herself properly. And then there's that awful disfiguring and unbalancing plastic surgery she was talked into doing. I've let her know that it's okay to be a little heavy as long as you're healthy. As long as you're fit, healthy-heavy can give you a chance at another important H, and that's happy. Maybe when she stops fighting with herself, she can finally focus on fighting evil.
Defeat the enemy within yourself, and there's no limit to what you can accomplish! All I want is a hug! Of course, this will likely get caught in the series of tubes Senator Ted Stevens claims the Internet is made out of, but I just happen to have IMAO's copy of the map of tubes and I found a compass in my Cracker Jack box.
There's also a Flikr Group called Furry Friday. After weeks of bloody conflict, a weary Kofi Annan pens a heartfelt confession to his long-lost lover I certainly expected the widespread destruction in Gaza after the killing and kidnapping of Israeli soldiers, but I didn't anticipate the disproportionate attacks on Lebanon. I'm so much better at telling peacekeeping forces to turn their backs on massacres and murders, like in Kosovo and Rwanda, or the kidnapping of the Israeli soldiers in Or the Congo.
Or East Timor. Oh well. The worst part of this whole thing is that it's getting hard to keep the soldiers hidden in the headquarters building. Everyone thinks they're in the Iranian embassies in Gaza and Beirut, but they just held them for me before I could arrange "diplomatic" transport.
It's almost like a damned Marx Brothers movie. Maids keep walking in on me as I'm sticking tasers in the soldiers' faces, but they're easily sent back to the Amazonian tribes we kidnapped them from. Commissary asks why I'm ordering extra meals to be sent to my office every day. Wolf Blitzer even noticed them in the corner during an interview a few days ago, but I told him to say nothing and he's been good for it ever since.
One managed to grab a phone and tried to call his embassy, but thank God we haven't paid the phone bill in weeks. I guess Kojo dipping his hand into the till every now and then has its advantages. We pass the time by playing Bridge, letting various OIC delegation representatives torture confessions out of them, and listening to jazz classics.
When I go home at night, Mark Malloch Brown you remember him, don't you? Thank God I came in early yesterday. Marky was trying to burn one of their flags in front of them and I grabbed it out of his hand and stomped it out before the sprinkler system went off.
I didn't realize we didn't have a functioning sprinkler system up on this floor. It's so much easier to do it in my office than out in the park, and there's no tourists or press ro catch me, either.
I told Nasrallah he could just use the bases for Poker Night and the occasional storage of weapons. Maybe using them for cover, but they'd have to return any blue helmets they borrowed from the armory to hide their identity. I didn't realize he'd start using them for cover all of the time. I'd better plan trips to China, Austria, Finland, and Canada to make nice with the families and convince them to go all Corrie on the Jews for killing their kids.
Never a dull day, right? Those damn Australians, saying that sending troops to the area before a permanent cease-fire would be a suicide mission. Now I've got hundreds of thousands of applications from Iran and Palestine and Pakistan demanding to sign up for that mission. It's hard enough to budget for the helmets and ambulances, but it's been a long time since the General Assembly authorized the procurement of virgins for peacejihadis I mean peacekeepers.
I'd better wrap this up before that barbarian John Bolton comes up here and kicks the door down. I still miss you, and don't get all jealous at the photos people are putting up of me an Nasrallah hugging and shaking hands and smiling. We're just the best of friends.
Time hits bottom, stops digging, and instead gossips about it having anal sex - and you are there:. In her new role she will be coordinating TIME. Hello, everyone. It's your old pal, Laurence Simon, and I'd like to apologize for not having written much in the past few days. After President Bush vetoed Congress' attempt to open up stem cell research and Congress failed to overcome that veto, it's been fairly busy around here. A lot of people have been mocking the use of the term "fetal farming" and I've got to say that the mockery needs to end and the understanding needs to begin.
There are literally thousands of family-owned fetal farms out there in the heartland that were already having a hard time making ends meet, working hard with the time-honored traditional culturing and harvesting of fetal stem cells. Believe me, there's no more honest day's work than a man getting up at the crack of dawn to milk the zygotes and gather up the eggs. The salt of the earth, these people are. Sadly, these people were already being squeezed out by corporate mega-fetalfarms buying up property, office space, and farm equipment.
Access to the approved stem-cell lines was supposed to be guaranteed, but the mega-corporations have a habit of violating their timetables, or they hand over inferior lines of genetic research to the little man. With the constant budget cutbacks of fetal farm subsidies and ruthless overseas competition often state-subsidized, like Airbus is in the aircraft assembly industrythe Family Fetal Farmer may become a thing of the past now that the practice will remain illegal.
If you've never been to a Fetal Farm Harvest Festival or taken the time to learn more at your state's annual fair, well, perhaps you should avail yourself to the opportunity next time you can grab at it - they're not going to be around forever at this rate. So, Album), in response to this sociological disaster happening in our scientific heartland, I've been working with Willie Nelson to put together Fetal Farm Aid.
We haven't come up with a venue, but we're considering the Durham area to take advantage of the many research facilities there for after-concert protest marches.
We're just waiting for the permits and Willie to run out of dope long enough for his attorneys to clear his signature as valid. Now, you'd expect such a concert to include Farm Aid regulars such as John Cougar Mellencamp, but we've been having a hard time reaching him since he's been changing his name on a near-annual basis. Hopefully, he'll stop changing it long enough for us to be able to look him up in the White Pages and send him a bus pass.
Then there's the Grand Marshall of MC. Once again, Willie's just too toked up to string three words together without him choking on a braid or getting confused with a Kinky Friedman For Governor rally, so we're thinking about inviting a celebrity with name-recognition and a track record of supporting stem cell research.
The first person to come to mind was Christopher Reeve, but he hasn't answered any of my letters, emails or calls. In fact, the last time I called, the number had been disconnected. Did his wife Dana forget to pay the phone bill? She's been so good to Chris up until now, I hope she isn't cheating on him or anything. Since the Reeves are being so difficult about it, I considered using Michael J.
Fox as a backup plan. He's been a strong advocate of the cause, and based on his guitar work in Back To The Future he might even be convinced to play a few licks. Sadly, someone sent me a tape of Michael's most recent testimony before Congress on the issue, and I've got to tell you: this man seriously needs help! I hope that someone who loves him dearly will get him into AA so he can kick the booze habit and straighten out his life.
Maybe then people might be able to focus on his stand against blocking stem cell research for disfiguring and distracting degenerative maladies instead of his distracting behavior. Until then, do what you can to support your local Family Fetal Farm. In fact, why not head out there for a weekend and pick your own fetal farm fresh stem cells Apparently, California is in some kind of Stage 1 Power Emergency right now.
Anyway, since the official response to a Stage 1 Power Emergency is "Blame Enron" I have the distinct feeling Album) crisis will only deepen. So, for all of our regular IMAO readers in California threatened with eternal darkness and the collapse of what passes for civilization there on the Left Coast, IMAO has prepared a list of things to do during your electricity-free time Take off your socks, name one of them "Greenwald," and have them give each other high praise for writing interesting left-wing posts.
Stick forks in dead electrical sockets, shout loudly "My God! Sticking forks in electrical outlets is so fun! I wish the power would never come back! Simmer smugly, knowing that you're morally far superior to all of those St. Louis red-stater jerks who are sitting in the dark. Harm yourself grievously. They never cut off electricity to hospitals, you know, so as the power grids go up and down you'll be safe and comfy in your hospital bed. Stay amused by reading your IMAO merchandise over and over.
You know, for a guy who got a few hundred extra votes in because of confused old Jews living in Boca Raton, Florida, Pat Buchanan can be such an ungrateful jerk. What's his first clue? Did he find a six-pointed star on his American Flag Depends garments this morning or something? Next time, the World Zionist Conspiracy is going to rig the butterfly ballots so that people voting for the liberal robot envirofreak tool will end up voting for "Pat Buchanan is an ungrateful jerk.
It didn't help that my great-grandfather was a professional boxer who Q: What has the world learned from Kofi Annan's repeated demands for a ceasefire in Lebanon and, with the European Union, refusal to recognize Hezbollah as a terrorist entity? A: Osama Bin Laden was a real dumbass for not building schools, hospitals, "independent" media outlets, and other charitable insitutions under the Al-Qaeda banner like Hezbollah did.
Frisky freaks out, as he always does. Piper leaps from the arm of the couch and hides. She's been doing this a lot, since the little furry psychic freaks out half a second before I sneeze Nardo just sits there, looking stupid as usual.
But the hippie bastard came back. Wanna tell me where he is so I can try again? Then I shut the door. Gotta find the kitty treats to convince the cats that it's safe to lay around and do nothing out in the open again. So I was watching CNN's news while eating lunch today when they toss to some chick in another studio showing off their new weather center set.
You know, just in case there might be a hurricane this year to interrupt the constant updates about shark attacks or missing white women or Christiane Amanpour interviewing angry Muslim Arab after angry Muslim Arab with the occasional self-hating liberal Jew born in Israel who's too ashamed to call himself Israeli.
Anyway, she's sitting at a desk holding a large tethered remote, grinning like a madwoman and showing off about half a dozen large flat-panel monitors suspended with dual aluminum pole struts. Oh, and a robotic pedestal camera roaming around the set like some big-eyed Dalek. Not that this robotic camera is used for the main desk shot, since that appears to be a fixed location she sits in. Oh, and an overhead shot to show the whole set with all the monitors at a resultion where you're guaranteed not to be able to see anything.
So she shows off the remote Feeds from around the world A telestrator with various icons she can dot over the landscape A few temperature maps A monitor feeding back to the CNN anhcor set All in all, nothing new.
And on top of that, she has to get up and walk around to show most of it off. But then, she saves the most impressive part for last: a freestanding curved display monitor.
But she is pointing right at the freestanding display, and mentions that there's no chroma-key there. It's a real monitor, she can look right at the map along with us, no need to use "guide" monitors on their side of a chroma-key display. No, you can watch the back of her head and she looks for various highlights to point out to us. So, for all this junk in a studio in CNN's Atlanta Headquarters, the hundreds of thousands of dollars spent on equipment and design and wiring and manpower, the array of monitors she has to get up and walk around to dramatically Now that there's no chroma-key, the weathergirl can wear any damn color clothes she wants to.
Q: Reports are breaking that a Hezbollah rocket has hit an Israeli hospital in the town of Safed. Doesn't "proportional response" dictate that Israel can strike a Hezbollah-funded hospital with impunity? I've been asked countless times by the other IMAO bloggers to weigh in on the proxy war that Syria and Ian find themselves in with Iran right now.
You see, this is all one big distraction for a failed policy. The news fills up with scenes of Rafik Hariri International's fuel tanks blowing sky-high, missiles raining down on Haifa, and protests all around the world accusing Israel of the first genocide in history which has resulted in a population explosion and not a population reduction or extermination. It's all a ploy to get them to breed themselves into a mass starvation. No, it's a shark policy.
The failed policy of sharks to avoid media attention when they plot their attacks on innocent jet ski riders, fishermen, and swimmers. No, really. When was the last time you heard the MSM geeking out over a shark attack in Florida?
This entire Arabs taking soldiers hostages and the IDF pounding the snot out of anything that makes a nasty face back situation was all just a clever ruse to distract the public from the real problem, which is shark attacks. Let's just focus on that first statement, because it's the real problem here. That first statement tells a lot about the sorry state of the media these days.
Throw all your resources at one story, do it to death, ratings drop because the public's bored with no front on The War Against Sharks, and they get led off to a sexier and more interesting conflict. You'd think the gator attacks in Florida would have thrown people off, but people were still wondering when the next shark attack would happen. It's only a matter of time So when someone tells you that it's all just a big Zionist Conspiracy in the media, tell them the Jews don't control the media, people.
It's really the sharks. Okay, so it might be Jewish sharks, but I don't know of any rabbi with the cojones to wave a bris knife at a Great White for the conversion.
Eric J. What's this about Meryl Yourish? I thought you were my scheming Jew! Zionist Conspiracy Checks and all. So, I figured I'm just gathering intelligence for Otherwise I'll LAIR: Just Hamas, Hezbollah, Israel, Lebanon In order to help you keep track of how Kofi Annan feels today, I've decided to put together a fun Bingo game:. Every time you hear any of these phrases in a Kofi Annan speech about the situation in Gaza or Lebanon, just mark off the square.
For example, let's examine this statement to reporters in Rome:. Reckless and dangerous actions will only lead to further bloodshed and instabilityinflaming an already highly volatile region.
Okay, I've bolden the buzzwords that I figure are close enough to what's in the squares to qualify for chips Still not Bingo. Sure, some of the IMAO bloggers have cats, but catblogging duties are assived by drawing straws every week and I keep drawing the short straw. News Corp started an online safety campaign today. In real life it only takes a few minutes to do the same for our kids," Sutherland says. You just need a few simple tips: Don't let them run into trouble on the Internet - use common sense.
Here's a common sense safety tip for Fox News a subsidiary of News Corp : if you're a correspondent in a war zone, wear a helmet if you're going to reveal troop positions on air.
Remember all those chicks dancing around for democracy in Beirut's central square and everyone blithering about "Democracy Hotties" as if it meant something? From the home country of the man who wrote the Palestinian anthem about "volcanoes of revenge" comes the latest melody of suicidal idiocy :.
Government spokesman Evangelos Antonaros also urged the Hizbullah to release Israeli soldiers held hostage. I didn't see any restraint on the part of the Greeks when they were wiping out November 17 cells before the Olympics. But then, this is coming from a country who's Honor Guard in front of their Tomb of the Unknown Soldier wears girlier skirts than the Scottish in their kilts.
No, really, Greece. How do you pick these guys Slurping down malakas milkshakes in the mess hall? Is the lack of a purse or a handbag because Louis Vuitton doesn't design ammo pouches? Your flag may be blue and white, but it might as well be a rainbow flag from the Castro District. But not just any memorial service, mind you. It was complete with former mayors collapsing from their defibrillators going offformer presidents and their anti-Semitic lackeys and everything.
Lanier collapsed in the sanctuary as the service was about to begin after his heart-monitoring device detected an irregular heartbeat and shocked his heart back into a normal rhythm. The man died from a heart attack. Nobody tied him to the back of a truck and dragged him across Hell's Half Acre.
Ken Lay as Jesus? Jesus Christ: Preached the truth to the faithful. Ken Lay: Lied about Enron's viability to employees the bitter end. Jesus Christ: Right hand man was Peter, who stuck by him to the bitter end. Ken Lay: Right hand man was Jeffrey Skilling, who bolted at first opportunity. Jesus Christ: Faced his accusers. Ken Lay: Had his attorneys file motion after motion, avoided trial for years. Jesus Christ: Supposedly betrayed by Judas, but the Gnostics say they planned it all. Jesus Christ: Killed by the Jews I mean Roman soldiers.
Ken Lay: Killed by a heart attack. Jesus Christ: "Why hast thou forsaken me? Jesus Christ: Shoved behind a rock, came back after three days. Ken Lay: Cremated, we're still waiting.
The other night, I made the mistake of flipping through the channels before the St. I half-sorta listened to the Andy Rooney piece while doing some kind of kitchen or cooking chore. It had something to do with too many people in America I'd agree in Andy Rooney's case and his solution for it.
Hinter Dem Weißen Berg - Various - Super Hits 75 (Vinyl, LP), Melodia En Abril - Amado Borcela - Guapacha El Mejor (Vinyl, LP), Inikamoze* - Hardware (Vinyl), Everything She Wants - Wham! - Make It Big (CD, Album), Latino Disko - Various - DJ Set (CD), Hands On Yello (Hardsequencer) - Yello - Hands On Yello (Cassette), The Immediate (4) - Manbouy (CD, Album), Polkan Gar - Gnesta-Kalles Kapell - Swedish Dances (Vinyl, LP, Album), 20:20 - Wizard Ho Ho - Born Under A Bad Sign (Cassette, Album)